Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.
Conan O’Brien
Here was the scene: I was leaving in the morning for a flight to New York. Besides trying to do my part to take care of things at the Wellstone Center in the Redwoods, I had a huge amount of book work to get done, all before I could board my flight, and the afternoon was slipping away.
I decided I had to go for a long run. I needed to drop off a check at the bank, so I could do my favorite run, four miles out our door down to the Capitola Pier. It felt great be out and running, my first long run in months, but along the way it dawned on me that I’d badly miscalculated: I wasn’t going to make it to the bank before closing. I ran as hard as I could and hoped I’d get lucky.
I’ve been writing in this blog about kindness, and I was reminded that day that it’s a two-way street. We want to treat others with kindness, but we also want to believe in kindness and be receptive to it. As I approached the bank, I was smiling – I was just sure someone would make an exception and deposit my check.
I tried the door to the bank: locked. I peered inside and saw a few tellers, but none would even make eye contact. I tried knocking. Nothing. I walked around to the drive-up window, which according to the website should still be open, and knocked there, and a woman looked at me with a kind of bland wide-eyed outrage and said no, she couldn’t help me. Through all this, I sidestepped any urge to start on a rant, vocal or inside my head, on how people have turned into machines and always follow procedure and no one can just be human. I went back to the other doors, and knocked again, loud enough to indicate I was not going anywhere unless someone came out.
A woman did. She looked out at me, wary but not hostile, and explained they were closed. I asked her if she could please – I’d be very appreciative – accept a check to deposit. She said there was nothing she could do, they were shut down. That should have been it: a small detail, but if I’d failed to get that check cashed, and had to wait a week, I’d have felt terrible. I stayed positive, and she and I found a solution: She would take the check, keep it and deposit it in the morning.
I finished my run, down to the wharf, looking out on a riot of sea birds, half-hearing the banter of the fisherpeople out there talking about what was biting, then ran (and finally walked) back uphill to home. That night, riding a nice post-run sense of exhilaration, I had my best writing day this year on the book I will publish next spring. The kindness of that bank teller made a huge difference for me. I caught my flight to New York with fresh progress under my belt, and the whole trip was transformed, all in a way shaped by one act of kindness.
I’m writing this blog to say thank you, bank teller, and to urge any of you reading this blog now to tell your story of a simple act of kindness. Below are more quotes on kindness we’re gathering for our forthcoming Wellstone Books title The Little Book of Kind, in an effort led by our excellent summer intern Danielle Lerner. Let us know in the comments which are your favorite. Or add your own.
Kindness is stronger than fear.
Cicero
Kind people have a way of working their way inside me and rooting there.
Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games
Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
Mother Teresa
I choose to rise up out of that storm and see that in moments of desperation, fear, and helplessness, each of us can be a rainbow of hope, doing what we can to extend ourselves in kindness and grace to one another. And I know for sure that there is no them – there’s only us.
Oprah Winfrey
What we all have in common is an appreciation of kindness and compassion; all the religions have this. We all lean towards love.
Richard Gere
Kindness in ourselves is the honey that blunts the sting of unkindness in another.
Grantland Rice
– Steve Kettmann, co-founder, WCR
Steve’s earlier blogs:
Remembering Those We’ve Loved and Lost
Were You Kind to Someone Today?